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Monday, 19 August 2013

A response to 'Pissed off Mother' in Newcastle, Ontario.



Dear 'Pissed off Mother.'

Firstly, my apologies for not addressing you by name, but seeing as you did not have the courage to sign the nasty letter that you sent to one of your neighbours recently, I have no choice.

There is a woman in your street, a Grandmother, who looks after her autistic grandson sometimes. A Grandmother doing what millions of Grandmothers around the world do. Looking after her grandchild. I am sure you will do the same for your grandchildren one day.
However, this Grandmother had her heart broken by words. Words that YOU wrote to her.

Her grandson has autism. He didn't choose to have it, nor did his family choose for him to have it, it just happens. To 1 in 88 people. Autism happens. You have no idea what it is like having autism in the family.
It is sleep deprivation, it is fear for the future, it is having to put up with judgements on your parenting skills and seeing stares, head shakes and hearing comments like 'Why can't you control your child' or 'You should just keep him locked up at home.' But, it is also sheer amazement at how our loved one with autism navigates through this world which is so strange and crazy to them. It is the celebration of the achievements, things that we were told our loved ones would never do. It is watching them beat the odds and fulfilling potentials. It is love, patience and wonder.

You wished that child dead. A child. You wished a child dead. What kind of place must your mind be? What hope do your own children have with a mother who would wish another child to be 'euthanised' simply because they have special needs?? That takes a special kind of evil. But to actually write that to a member of that child's family? What kind of person could ever do that?

I feel sorry for the family who you hurt so badly with your cruel, heartless words, but I feel more sorry for you. That child did not choose to have autism, but YOU chose to be unbelievably callous and write that letter. I feel such pity for you. Imagine having  to live with that kind of evil in you. I am so sorry, really I am. Your heart must be such a black and dark place.

No, that child did not choose to have autism, but I bet, given the choice of that or being the kind of person you are, most of us would choose autism. I cannot imagine anything worse than having a soul so devoid of compassion that you would wish a child be euthanised simply because they have special needs.

I also feel sorry for your children. What kind of morals are you instilling into them?? Are they going to grow up lacking any compassion and empathy for anyone who isn't, as you put it 'normal??'

If you are the poster girl for 'normal' then I'll pass, thanks. But I think you will find that most 'normal' people are appalled by your actions. It is you that is the scourge of our world, not people with autism, or any special needs or disabilities.
You say that we families with special needs children want special treatment. Actually, all we want is to be able to get on with our lives without us or our loved ones being judged or frowned upon or laughed at or mocked. Is that REALLY too much to ask?  You let us get on with our lives and we will do the same for you. Sounds like a good way forward, doesn't it?

I sincerely hope your life is never touched by autism or any special needs. I say that because I would hate for any child with those needs to have to put up with you in their life. It is hard enough for them without having a family member who has your sickening attitude.

I fear that the end result of this will be that it will be YOU who has to move out of your neighbourhood. From the news reports I have read, you are not the only 'pissed off' person there, but it is YOU they are pissed off at. I guess you never really thought this through, did you?

Karma, they tell me, can be a real bitch. I hope for your sake that she is lenient on you. It is punishment enough for you to have to go through life with such a nasty, cruel heart.

I wish you no ill, but I wish you enlightenment. Educate yourself about autism. Go and meet some people with autism. See how wonderful and inspiring they are. God knows you could do with some inspiration right now.

Yours

Laura Henretty - A mother of a child with autism, who has every right to be pissed off at you and who is not afraid to sign her name.

105 comments:

  1. HEAR! HEAR! The letter crushed my heart when I read it and made me cry. Sending lots of love to the poor family who received it. x

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    1. Absolutely JB. I cried all the way through it and had to write this to channel some of my anger appropriately. Thank you x

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    2. Thank you for your eloquent words. I cried all the way though the letter and the news report as well. You are right, That woman is a "special kind of evil." I fear for her children, and what hate and stress they must be recipients of when they are less than perfect.

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    3. Good job with this letter to this person that is to cowardly to sign their name. Karma is a bitch and even if the person is never found out. I have a good feeling Karma is already getting them. My child has autism and I know several other children with autism. it is completely thoughtless of this women. Karma will find her!

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    4. thank you I had a sit down today because I was upset you made me happy. me my brother and my cousin have it some people just don't get it you know.

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    5. Laura this response is amazing and I think you are an amazing mother to an amazing child. I too cried reading your letter, I salute you!!!

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    6. Thank You for your reply letter back Laura. This response tells it like it is. I think you are one awesome lady and your child is blessed to have you as his/her mother, and certainly you are blessed having them as a child. God loves people, all people not just ones who have nothing debilitating them as we know he made us all and some he blessed with special needs to teach the world how to really Love Deeply and anyone who can't I truly Pity them I wouldn't want too walk one foot step in their place God Bless You Laura....I am Lynda out of North Carolina

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    7. Thank You for writing this. Like thousands of others across Canada and the world, we are still weeping. I know the world is full of hatred and greed and intolerance. But there is also beauty and love and Max's family is that beauty and love.

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    8. Well said, thank you for sharing your words of windom with us. I would not have been able to say it so kindly. I have a cousin with autism whom we love dearly, he's special and kind and caring...too bad he's much wiser than the nameles mother. I bet she's regretting such hate now or I certainly hope so.

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    9. I say thank you for writing this, I have 2 special needs children. There step grandmother has passed judgement on them and has defined my kids who is "normal" and who is not. I thank you for writing this to make ignorant ppl aware of autism. Ignorant people have no idea the struggles, feelings, that a family goes through. Every accomplishment that is made is a big deal. i say thank you again!! I am Rose a mother of 2 special needs children from NY

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    10. I applaud you for writing this. I too was mortified that someone could write these horrible things. Perhaps your words will make that "woman" think and others like her. I also feel so sorry for the family but more sorry that there are suck ignorant and cruel people in this world.

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    11. OPRAH WINFREY selected the next town close by as one of the nicest neighbourhoods in Ontario.. she held a family contest there last summer. I really hope she catches hold of this letter/news and in the same time they find the person who wrote this. This will not blow over for you letter sender.. ironically you instilled a sickness upon your own future, a name for yourself that will be remembered forever. You had a choice before all this.. this kid does'nt. Irony.

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    12. Well stated. From one Autism Mum to another. Thank you for your eloquent words. :)

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    13. LAURA.. BEAUTIFUL!!!
      My son has Aspergers (High Functioning Autism) for those who don't know he has no social skills. Most people that don't know him see him as rude or extremely shy those that know him all love him. A kinder, gentler, more honest person you will never meet. He just has to learn the social skills we all take for granted.
      My cousin has an autistic son that has pretty much over come it as some can, he has grown into a great young man that functions in this world just fine. when he was younger you would not have guessed he would excel as he has. My sister inlaw has 2 autistic sons they are great kids. My step cousin has 2 sons with fragile X. So the Autism spectrum runs in my family. I am a volunteer with the Canadian National Autism Foundation.

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    14. It is nice to know that someone had the cajones to write such an inspiring letter. My son has autism and we face the same judgement and acusations everyday. Thank You for letting me know that there are people out there that do care enough to stand up for what is write and not ignore the situation.

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    15. When I read that letter aimed at the family with the autistic child I was sickened, I am very sure that each and every one of us who has a special needs child would love for their child not to have their conditions...but guess what? they do and each and every second of each day and night we live with this, and it hurts with every disappointed look and head shake we get from other people. If only people could educate themselves first without passing judgement then hatred like this wouldn't exist. My son has ADHD,ODD,CD,A Sleep disorder and Crohns disease and has been called every name you can think of, and we have both been threatened by ignorant people...but I stand up to each and everyone of them, its hard when you feel so alone and judged but with people like you that stand up to ignorance maybe just maybe we can put an end to such vile ignorance.

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    16. It warms my heart to see the outpouring of support for that innocent child. At the same time, it reminds me to be more patient when I hear a child who seems out of control in a public place. Thank you for that. Finally, to the woman who wrote the letter, it embarrasses me deeply that she is a Canadian. We are not supposed to be like that. I love my country for its tolerance and kindness and it is a huge set back to here of such atrocities. Good luck to the woman who wrote that letter in finding her heart again.

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  2. You just wrote exactly what I was thinking yesterday while reading that letter!

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    1. I think it's what every decent person whether they have a child with special neds or not would be thinking. Although there are probably a few swear words in those thoughts too :) Thank you x

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    2. Well said Laura.I read that letter written to the Grandma and I was shocked beyond belief!Thank you for putting into words what therest of us were thinking and expressing without any swear words Altho am sure we could all think of several to describe this person.Sandra from Brisbane,Australia x

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  3. Bravo. The pain in realising the letter was not a hoax was overwhelming and you have expressed the feelings of all families hurt by this "mother".

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    1. Thank you Suzie. Yes, I didn't post the letter on my autism FB page yesterday in case it was a hoax, as I hoped it was. When I saw that it had been reported in the Toronto newspaper, my heart sank too. So sad that anyone could be so unfeeling and heartless x

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    2. Well said. I have a child with autism. I have also been blessed with great neighbors. I could not imagine receiving this letter.

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    3. I doubt anyone could imagine receiving anything quite so disgustingly nasty. I too am blessed with wonderful neighbours. I believe the community there has really pulled together and are disgusted at what was written.

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  4. its worse than that...she didnt wish him dead purely because he was special needs but because he was disturbing her "quiet time"! oh didums!!

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    1. Yes. How terrible it must be for her.....Our hearts bleed, don't they....Sad, horrible woman that she is.

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  5. This is a wonderful letter in response to a letter so filled with hate. It shocks me that there are people in this world as ignorant as "pissed off mother". I wonder if she cares about people with Cancer, Diabetes, etc. Autism isn't a disease but it deserves the same compassion. This situation just makes me so sad for the family. I can't imagine someone sending me a letter like that about either of my sons. How angry, devastated, and shocked I would feel. My love and support goes out to the wonderful family of this boy.
    God only gives special children to special parents that will do right by them!

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  6. Nicely put Laura. Cannot believe another mother could say this about any child. I Only hope people find out who wrote this disgusting letter & then they can be shown the devastation & hurt they caused a community who finds the outside world terrifying enough without people like the letter writer in it

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  9. Thank you for writing this and signing your name.
    that woman was a coward and I hope she is found and karma does find her as well.

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  10. Thank you for this wonderful reply. I hope the vial disgusting person that wrote this letter reads it and understands the anger they have spread worldwide.

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  11. Well said! Maybe karma will court order her to get educated & work with Autistic kids ;) I wouldn't trade my Aspies for the world!

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    1. Thank you. I agree, I wouldn't trade my son for the world either x

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    2. she should work with special needs kids and then she will discover on how wonderful these kids are. i read that letter and thought to myself on how cruel that person was writing about some kid that she never knew and never spent time with. My heart goes out to that family, because the person that is writing this note has a development disability. Hi my name is Angela and i now how it feels to be treated badly. I was treated badly and school and made fun at because of what i have.

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    3. she should work with special needs kids and then she will discover on how wonderful these kids are. i read that letter and thought to myself on how cruel that person was writing about some kid that she never knew and never spent time with. My heart goes out to that family, because the person that is writing this note has a development disability. Hi my name is Angela and i now how it feels to be treated badly. I was treated badly and school and made fun at because of what i have.

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  12. I am so glad I didn't see her vile letter as I fear it would have broken my heart :( ....

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  13. To the pissed of mother.....I was in shock that a human could be so callous and write such evil words to another mother. What kind of mother could speak such words? You will have to live your life knowing you were this cruel even if we don't find out who you are. And if you are in fact a mother I hope your children don't learn of your hateful words and that you told another mother to have her child euthanize.God help you as you need it..you have a heartless and cruel soul and I am glad you are not related to me as I would be embarrassed and ashamed to be related to a person such as you......

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  14. tammy kubasti nutaitis19 August 2013 at 21:23

    Obviously that lady does not have a heart actually Ithink she is a monster! God has chosen that child because the lord knew that family would love and care for that child forever!!!!

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  15. I would say that "pissed of mothers" comments came out of evil and lack of knowledge because had she known about autism she would have known that some of the most profound minds have come from individuals with ASD. Temple Grandin, Carly Flieshmann, Jacob Barnett and Albert Einstein was most likely on the spectrum. Their minds have capabilities far beyond our "normal" ones! And for those individuals with Autism that are not gifted with immense intelligence but struggle to cope with all the input coming at them and output in a ways that are foreign to "neuro typical" people have the profound gift of teaching compassion, acceptance, patience and challenge us "normal" people to look at the world differently. Maybe if that lady had crossed the street, met and interacted with that child with autism, she too would have had a life changing experience, instead of judging from her window!

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  16. As a leader of a Summer club for children in my area. I deal daily with these kind of children. I have to say that they really have enriched my world. I had never dealt with them or their families until I got involved in this club 5 years ago and now cannot imagine not being around them. Helping them learn what everyone takes for granted and seeing the pleasure they get from even the most simple of things. May God Bless you all x

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  17. Sabrina Barillaro19 August 2013 at 21:46

    Very well written response. I agree with you, 110%!

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  18. The bad thing is on the news, when everyone in the neighborhood was out there supporting him, that coward was probably out there acting like she cared just so no one would know who it was. I really hope she feels all of this anger and it eats at her till she does something and tries to give back to the people she has hurt. Not just that family but all of us with beautiful kids just like that boy. So glad he doesn't understand her hatred and it will never effect him, but that black evil heart she has will destroy her. if she thinks she is free of the threat of God forbid autism she needs to remember her kids will have kids,. Her kids could be in a wreck or fall and end up with a brain injury worse than AUTISM would she euthanize them?.....
    My son is amazing and i would not trade one day that i have had with him for anything in this world. The things he has brought to all of our lives its incredible, this letter hurt for so many reasons and brought back all of the stares and rude comments and that one dr that told me to put him in a home and forget him when he was three it brought it all back. I showed that dr how great he is and now is 15 still amazing. I hope someone shows her and drags he butt out of this life she thinks she lives in and puts her in the real world with all of us. Lots of love to all of you non normal people out there cause I will proudly say I am not nor will i ever be normal if it means being like her

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  19. Thankyou a well written letter. Hope this lady has a change of heart. Lyn.

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  20. I do not know you Laura, but I just wanted to say "thank you." What a eloquent and well versed letter you wrote to that so called human being. I have been seething all day over it!!:( I just cannot believe how much ignorance and intolerance one person's heart can hold. I hope for her sake she never has to experience autism or special needs, because that disgusting person would never be up for the challenge. This stuff isn't for wimps!! God bless you and yours and thanks again!!:)
    sincerely
    Rachel Richardson..Mom of Ryan who has autism

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  21. amen and amen sister!! I don't know you either but again I say AMEN! what evil dark and broken soul has that much evil and hate. We are called to stand and protect those who can't protect themselves. Sounds like this boy and his family have a lot of protectors surrounding them. thank you for writing this.

    from one blogger to another,

    Jackie Schikosky

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  22. To every one of you who has left comments, thank you, thank you for taking the time to do so. I know the terrible letter that was written has affected many of us. But, we all need to take heart from the fact that the family involved have received so much support from the others in their community and that this has shocked most of the world!!! Evil is in the minority, it's just that it is the evil we remember. Thank you again for your lovely comments xx

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  23. Here here well said.Written with dignity
    Thankyou for writing this from a mother who hastwo chchildren on the spectrum .Thankyou again.It just shows that it brings the autism community around the world that we support eachother and stick together.

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  24. Here here well said.Written with dignity
    Thankyou for writing this from a mother who hastwo chchildren on the spectrum .Thankyou again.It just shows that it brings the autism community around the world that we support eachother and stick together.

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  25. That was Truly amazing to read, thank you Laura, brought tears to my eyes especially after reading that horrendous letter, how can ppl be so cruel & heartless. My heart go's out to the family on the receiving end of that vile letter.
    As a mother of a beautiful teenage daughter with severe Autism, I have had neighbours complain she is noisy, I constantly try to engage her to quieten the noise but @ times it is not always possible, & that's when consideration & kindness is needed.
    Sending ((( Hugs))) to all you Autism Warriors xxx
    Thanks again Laura & pls follow back @lilove1970 x
    Andrea

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  26. Well put Laura. could not write that as i could not control the anger we feel towards this lowlife. So shall leave it there.

    Mr Brett Turner, Proud Father to an amazing Autistic little boy, who is worth a billion of that evil thing!!!

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  27. That was absolutely beautiful. From a mom with 3 children with Autism. ROCK ON! Thank you!

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  28. Thank you again to all of you for your comments, I really do appreciate them I have posted this to the twitterfeed of City News Toronto so I am hoping that they may do something with it and that the 'mother' can actually read it! Thank you again x

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  29. I don't have children but this brought me to tears. It is rediculous to think that anyone feels this way, let alone, feels that it is right to write a disgusting/unacceptable note like that. On behalf of the larger Chicago community, we all support the family of that blessed child. Every person is a blessing--even the naive person who wrote the note. And by the way, someone who writes a note like that must have behavioral/mental problems they may want to seek help for.

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  30. I have three boys with a variety of special needs, ASD among them, and at first I thought the "pink" letter was a horrible prank...which was bad enough, but the fact that the letter was true completely dumbfounded me. Laura I would like to thank you for this wonderful response to "one pissed of mother", I couldn't have said it better myself.

    Maybe with some experience with people with different needs she can become like the Grinch and have her heart grow to learn compassion and understanding...maybe even love...who knows, anything is possible right?

    I would also like to show that I too am not afraid to sign my name! Although I suppose I wouldn't want anyone to know it was me who wrote that letter...silly idea here, if the address was hand written why don't the police have all people in the neighborhood write the address and have the samples compared by an expert to see who it was?

    Signed;
    Jesselyn Harris
    "One Proud Mother"

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  31. Hello,

    I have an 8 year old son who is autistic and when I seen that letter circulating on facebook I thought Yeah right just another hoax however, when indeed we found out it truly existed we were extremely torn apart deep inside for this family to have received such malicious and down right hatred of a letter. I wanted to show my support of your letter and would also like to sign my name as well. I will never be afraid to stand up for my kid or someone elses child who has Autism or any other intellectual disability. Im actually glad it was you whom wrote the response back to this "one pissed off mother" because if it were me it wouldn't have been pretty. I take great offense to those whom display such hatred and she should be punished by law of "Hate Crime" for the words she had written in her letter. Again, thank you for your response because knowing we have a voice for our children and others children is our only fight against these types of people who use ignorance as their foundation and we as a tight nit community of mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters,aunts, uncles and friends stand strong for the awareness and beliefs to protect our children and their future.

    Signed:
    Stephanie Lengyel
    "One Proud Mother"

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  32. Thank you! You said all I wanted to say without the swear words! Perfect! I have shared this on Facebook as I would love for this letter to go as viral as that hateful drivel did yesterday! We Autism Moms have enough hard/sad/stressful days... we don't need piling on. I am so thrilled to see the support, warmth and love shown for this family! We are all in this together! <3

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    1. Thank you for sharing!! And thank you again to everyone for your comments, I really appreciate them x

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  33. Laura I'm a reporter with citytv, can you call me? 416-302-6157
    Cynthia Mulligan

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    1. Cynthia. I am in the UK. I can email you if you give me an address??

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    2. Here is a link where you can send citytv a story, but I'm trying to find her email address for you...I think your letter is perfect <3

      http://www.citynews.ca/submit-story/

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    3. found something... cynthia.mulligan@citynews.rogers.com or tweet @CityCynthia :-)
      Deana (i'm local, i live in the region where this happened and went to school with Max's mom, so this is just too close to home and i want to get it out there too!)

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    4. Thank you both of you, I got a hold of Cynthia last night x

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  34. laura i agree with every thing u wrote u when i read what u said i was feeling everything u said and i really hope she gets it because they are wonderful children and they have so much joy to bring to our lives when they smile and laugh and have fun and u see it that just makes ur life so much brighter

    when they finish a project or help someone they are so proud of thenseleve which then makes us proud

    but people need to look pass the autisum or disabilities and see that they are just like us just with more joy and love for the world and everyone loves them for who thay are and that all children are loved by god or other people no matter in they are normal or not

    you wrote it perfectly and i am glad someone stood up to her

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  35. Stephanie Midkiff20 August 2013 at 21:05

    The letter from "Pissed Off Mother" outraged me beyond belief. I was so infuriated that both my husband and our roommate were scared. I have no children of my own. I do have two nephews that are autistic and I love them both dearly. They are both great gifts within my family. I Thank You from the deepest part of my soul for your words to that mother. I could never have shared my feelings so eloquently. Her words brought forth such anger in me that I could never have been so kind. Your letter has eased the anger in my heart. Thank you once again.

    With Deep Sincerity,

    Stephanie Midkiff "One Extremely Proud Aunt"

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  36. ProudAutisticMommy20 August 2013 at 21:16

    THANK YOU!!

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  37. Amen, sister! You did a wonderful job of rebutting hatred with sanity and compassion. I couldn't have said it better myself.

    For the record, I took my 16 year old Aspie son to the hospital to day to have outpatient surgery for his epilepsy. You have never seen a kid be so overwhelmed, yet try so very hard to be calm, helpful, and social. He even told little random stories to the staff! They might not have had much of a point, but they all praised him to us (they knew of his autism). I'd bet he behaved better than most neurotypical kids.

    He (and all other kids with the "scarlet A" of Autism/Asperger's Syndrome) deserves to be loved.

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    1. I actually have tears in my eyes, reading all your comments and knowing that somehow, I spoke for all of you when I wrote this. That means so much to me. Thank you all xxx

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  38. You said it all. Brilliantly! <3

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  39. Proud Godmother, friend, and neighbor of kids on the spectrum here to say that my world is broader for knowing these families, and I appreciate their willingness to teach me. I had the opportunity to encounter a little boy in a parking lot who was curious about my daughter. I said hi to him and let him touch her foot. Poor mom was excessively apologetic because of the jerks who yell at her for his exuberant exploration. The profuse apologies broke my heart. I really did want to take a second if she could spare it to speak to her. But she rushed away defensively, unable to abide my hope to know her even a little. it still saddens me, even 2 years later.

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  40. Holy Smokes! Well said!!! You said what everyone was feeling in their hearts. This letter needs to get into the papers and the news!!!

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    1. Share share share!! Really, anyone who wants to share it, please do. The more who share the more chance of it being read by the intended party. And thank you x

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  41. 1st of all, please accept my apologies on behalf of all the good residence of Newcastle, Ont. Can. for this one idiot. Secondly, your response, "BAZINGA". Right on the mark.

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  42. Very well said and as a community this has made us stronger. I have a special needs child and as much as the arrogance and ingorance of this person upsets and furiats me, it is now the law whom upsets me more to deem this letter as non hatred to try and wash this incident down stream. It is people like this whom take their time to compose well versed letters and let people like this mother whom disregards special children know we as parents, grandparents, friends or family and communities stick together and hopefully if she has any heart, writes her on well versed letter after she educates herself on the many sides of special needs specifically Autism as she chose to focus on this one and write one hell of a sympathetic appologetic letter addressing gwr selfishness and ignorance to this child and the community of special needs people. Thank you to all on behalf of the original writer whom have commented, these words go a lonf long way.

    Adam from Newcastle ;)

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  43. Signed, RAVENNA MERAZ, SAN ANTONIO TEXAS!21 August 2013 at 01:33

    Thank You Laura, I too am a PROUD mother of an autistic child (19), graduate, prom king n seeking employment...Its a waste of time to even acknowledge Miss Anonymous....Your words brought me to tears, I guess cause a majority of us can relate...THANK YOU AGAIN!!

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  44. Is it a crime that I wanna slap the pissed off mother? She made me very angry but this response made me feel sorry for her..... thank u for the post.....

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  45. Laura I could just hug you! Thank you for your amazing words. I have dealt with people like this "Pissed mom" who have acted and said very hateful things to my Autistic son.

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  46. Two huge thumbs up Laura! Well said! As a father of a son with autism, I couldn't have said it better!

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  47. It is people like you that this world needs more of! To all the "proud mothers" keep it up, your advocating for your children will hopefully help to educate the ignorant and unaccepting people of the world. My only hope is that letters such as yours Laura would get more media attention than the heartbreaking letter in the media currently.

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  48. Laura, I live very close to where Max's Grandma is. This community has been brought together in a way we could never have imagined by this womans vile letter. It is amazing to know the news of this reached accross the pond! With this kind of publicity I hope the awareness of Autism can be raised enough to prevent the heartache Max's family has endured happening to anybody else! Great letter! An amazing response! Thank you sooo much for your support!

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  49. Thank you to you and your family for actually sharing the letter... I can not imagine the shock, pain and disgust that your family must be feeling right now. I have seen your letter on a lot of facebook pages and a few of my facebook Mother groups, this is a very negative thing that has happened, the positive side is the out reach from the public and the awareness this has caused for many. Each child is special in their own way they deserve love, happiness and a good home.

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  50. As an educator I was shocked and angered at the letter written to the family who has a child with autism. I only hope that this woman is found and charges are pressed for harassment, uttering threats and a hate crime. I feel this individual is a danger to society and is passing on such hate and cruelty to her own children through her actions. Laura your letter was beautiful!

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  51. Thank you for saying, what we all were feeling♥

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  52. Thank you all again!! To the people here from Newcastle,well done to you all for rallying round and showing Max and his family that your neighbourhood does NOT feel the same way as this one wretched person does, and on behalf of all families touched by autism everywhere, thank you for supporting them when they need it most x

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  53. Many years ago I walked to my postbox to find an anonymous letter from a neighbour accusing the occupant of #26 (me) of stealing a valued family keepsake from an elderly neighbour. The letter called me many names, evil, heartless etc and stated that karma would get me if the writer didn't get me first. I was shocked, nauseated. I stood there looking around the street, wondering which neighbour had written it, and which elderly neighbour thought it was me. Was it the old lady over there watering her roses, the guy walking his dog on the footpath? It was one of the most horrible experiences I have ever had, it really effected me on a very personal level. The police were unable to find out who wrote the letter and told me to report to them if anything more happened. That letter ruined my happiness on that street. I couldn't go out the front door without looking around me, wondering who was looking at me, who had mistakenly thought I had done something I had not. I desperately wanted to say to someone, it wasn't me, but who could I say it to?

    This experience I had can only pale in comparison to the feelings that must be flowing through the family of this beautiful boy. As someone else wrote, I too believe it will be the writer of the letter who will ultimately be the one to move, who will ultimately be seen as "nothing but a nuisance and a problem to everyone else." Her peace "polluting whaling" is heard worldwide and is "dreadful" and it is she who will ultimately have to "go and live in a trailer in the woods" where surely after some reflection she will want to stay out of shame.

    Signed
    Sarah Fuller
    Mother to one Aspie
    Aunt to one Autie
    And lover of all innocents
    Australia

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    1. Sarah, I can only imagine how awful that was for you, thank you for sharing what must still be a hurtful experience x

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  54. Amen to u Laura! Having a 15 yr old Autistic daughter myself, I cried when I saw Max's Mom reading that horrible letter on the news. Our kids are truly amazing & inspiring, & I wouldn't trade my Kaitlyn for the world. You have said what I'm sure all of us parents of these angels wanted to say! Love from Another Proud Mother!

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  55. Amazing response Laura Henretty...also, some very wonderful comments I see here. Perhaps we need to thank 'one pissed off mother' for doing this. It brought a community together of beauty and compassion. Well done to you all, I'm most impressed and support all those that confront special needs children. Your job is more challenging yet more rewarding every day. Ignorance is something that I see more and more people are not willing to tolerate.

    I'm a mother of 2 children and I respect and admire all that I have read here. Good for you all for your strength and for seeing the strength with those who have special needs. I'm so embarassed for that 'pissed off mom' to think she was doing the neighbourhood a favour to write that nasty letter. To the family who had to face that disgusting letter, thank you for bringing that forward to the public. The more we hear of this, the more those ignorant people will be squashed.

    These comments, this letter above in reply to the pissed off mom was a great inspiration. Thank you again everyone for boosting my day.

    Patricia Zandona -- not afraid to show my name.

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  56. This is a comment I posted on my Facebook page after reading this "poison'! I was so frustrated after reading this hateful letter.
    Living with that much hate is a far worse handicap than autism. To Quote the letter, "No one has the guts to tell you", THAT'S RICH!!! Coming from an individual who DIDN'T SIGN the letter! I truly fear for her children. Living in an atmosphere where other children are marginalized for having special needs through no fault of their own, only cements the idea that 'children live what they learn." This parent is fostering hatred and intolerance among her own family. Don't worry, this individual will be found, but this time, sadly, the 'hatred' will be directed at the letter's author by a public who will feel justified in doing so. This is nothing but BULLYING in its highest form.

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  57. Well done.. you spoke the words that we all wanted to say, but in a way that was so much more kind and gentle than those that were coming from my mind. I says kudos to you for your patience, your kind heart and for taking the time to write a balanced reply, from someone who knows.

    I am blessed to have two healthy children, but I do have friends who do have autistic children, and I admire their incredible strength and celebrate with them on every little move forward. It takes courage, faith and strength of body and mind to raise any special needs child in a loving, healthy home. It sounds like you have that, and that makes you a special person.

    Thank you for taking time out of your busy day to convey the thoughts that many of us were thinking, but could not put as succinctly as you have done.

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    1. Thank you so much for those lovely words. And again, to everyone who has commented. What a wonderful community we have. Thank you xx

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  58. Thank you for that wonderful reply. Although I don't have an autistic child my sister has a daughter who is and several friends with autistic children. Your words are far kinder than mine could ever be. To be able to write a reply and not let your hate bleed through shows incredible power of will. I am a patient man but to attack my friends and family evoke a hate almost on par with her hateful letter.
    Again, thank you for being able to put into words what we would all love to say to this blackened hearted woman.

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  59. Thank you for putting into words what I could not. My twin brother and I have Cerbral Palsy and are in our late 30s. Our younger brother has Downs Syndrome. If anyone did that to him my twin and I would be sooo angry. We are very protective of him. Much love!!!!

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  60. Thank you for speaking and saying exactly what all us moms of special needs children were thinking. Send good thoughts to you and all the mothers whose heart was broken by reading that nasty woman's letter.

    Stephenie!

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  61. THE REAL KARMA IS21 August 2013 at 23:06

    The irony is ... when they find this person who wrote this letter.. she/he will themselves have to stay indoors, hide in public,will be seen as the actual nuisance to the neighbourhood. I cant wait till their caught and a name comes out! .. they are now worse of then their orginal complaint could ever be, see where hate gets you? .. what a lesson learnt wow.

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  62. Regardless if this woman is ever identified, I honestly believe that what goes around comes around. If she truly does have a conscience, this is going to haunt her for a long time. Small payback for what she's put this family through. Good job Laura! Your son is a lucky boy to have you :)

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  63. Good for you! Wishing you all the best!

    :) Heather

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  64. To all of you that have commented, thank you, from the bottom of my heart. Still struggling to believe that something I wrote to channel my own anger has now been read by over 15000 people!! Thank you and together, we can combat ignorance!!
    Laura x

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